Friday, March 13, 2009

Adventure Sports:: SwatTV Roadies 1.0 :: Future of Pakistan

Hi I am your host Mullah Omar

Welcome to the SwatTV Roadies 1.0. 2012 marks the first year of Roadies being organized in Pakistan.

First a brief history of SWAT TV ::

Last year various international satellite channels pulled out of Pakistan citing security reasons.So SWAT region decided to launch their own channel on the lines of MTv. Its a music channel where we show folk, rock and everykind of music. Motto of the channel is to spread jihadi music. As we all know music is everywhere, we can generate music from anything so we have positioned ourselves as the only channel showing music from bullets, tanks, grenades. Practice in training camps is shown live as we feel there can be no better music then the sound of bullets hitting the targets.

TRP of the channel touched new heights when we showed live second mutiny in as many as 3 years by Bangladeshi Rifles group. For two whole days our viewers listened to the sound of bullets, tanks rolling on Dhaka Roads. SwatTV was the first to show the whole incident infact our cameras were in place 2 hours before the event started as we have our network of reporters spread everywhere.

We have got exclusive rights of showing missile launch by North Korea in July 2012. One team is on way to Sri Lanka to meet the LTTE to get rights to show live attempt by LTTE to regain its lost area in Sri Lanka.

Before continuing further its time for a short commercial break::
(Companies selling military warfare and related equipments are given discount of 25%)


Ringa Ringa Rocks Ringa Ringa Rocks
SWAT Rocks .small big diagonal horizontal rocks SWAT Rocks
Buy SWAT rocks to be used during stone pelting spectacle
Buy 5 get 2 free
Ringa Ringa Rocks Ringa Ringa Rocks


Welcome back to  Al Qaeda SwatTV Roadies 1.0.

Further about the channel, Swat TV has generated huge interest and we are planning to launch the channel in Afghanistan, Bangladesh, Iran in a year or two.

Now about the Roadies.Since we got the idea of the show from a bald man in India (the most dangerous place in the world), we are getting thousands of enquires from the youth.

We have got large number of sponsors. Main sponsor is Al Qaeda, other being
Mulla Umar Consultancy Services .. "Consult us before killing",
Lahore Powder ... "For that heightened feeling",
Toiba Oil -  "Keeps your guns shinning"
and Swat Rocks - "For easy throws".

We have got 10 participants from different regions and first edition is an international one with participants from Afghanistan and Bangladesh also.
And for the participants everything will be unexpected, i.e expect the unexpected, there will be real stunts, killings, gun battles, and many more adventure sports tests.

Winner will get straight entry into the next planned mission of Al Qaeda at an unspecified location.

I will not reveal all the details as it is SwatTV Roadies 1.0 Expect the Unexpected

Till then its goodbye from all of us here at SwatTV Roadies 1.0

ps: Some people are not able to intrepret it and saying that its a sports blog and I should write only sports related posts. I feel the post is very much related to sports and such scenario can take place in future in Pakistan, we are seeing what is happening there and sports be it cricket or anything may not be possible in that country.  So it is like a dark humor which has some bitter reality in it.

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